've regularly attempted to put into words what my biggest takeaway from exchange is. In this process I've come up with a bunch of small things: I think I'm little more personable feel carefree content see where the day takes me and become very excited at prospects walking long distances. However change is way that deal discontent. To some extent spent life embracing sadness. There's been familiarity in situations love goes hand worry hurt. Self-pity can be an addicting drug realized sometimes incentive remain status quo. recognize doing so hurt myself people care about. wasn't exactly dealt easiest path but bent over backwards make sure it didn't get better. time who drove me tears made had no for chose fixate on every personal critique while refusing kind others. Placed cannot self-sabotage live what's essentially dream how good have it. A don't create unnecessarily large workload stick treat has world difference. retrospect sadness seems almost silly. given finger tips anything anywhere spend whoever choose. Essentially learned focus brings joy. The past few weeks felt odd desire nurture energy than ever before. It now occurs happiness feels like. hope going forward when work again remember protect peace. No bad choices despite knowing them me.